If your company went public and you made a large sum but not super-large, say $5 million, would you give any to family & friends? Why/why not? How about if you made $20 million? $100 million?
Giving money to family or friends
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Definitely…they probably had a hand in helping you get the big pay check, so you better pay them the back pay you owe them and pay them well!
Absolutly! My parents have paid for tons of stuff while raising me, it would be the least I could do to help them live comfortably. And I wouldn’t HAND my friend’s money. I would treat them to a trip or an experience we could both enjoy.
Absolutely. We’re all in this together.
Absolutely! At $5M, I’d give to all my relatives (sisters, parents, cousins, aunts) and at $15M+, I’d start adding in friends. Would LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to do that. I’ve been accused of “being mother to the world” as a criticism, but I love to take care of people, so I took it as a complement!
If you were to ask me at this exact second, I’d say it’d all go straight to my family because my Dad’s in the hospital with no sign of being released yet.
If I didn’t have any crises, I’d split it up enough to make family/friends/self comfortable, an adequate amount back into the business, and any excess goes to church and charity. Everyone I know is of the same mindset, wanting to be taken care of, but not rich.
I would, but I’d do my best to hide the money I made from my friends and family.
Well, I guess it would depend on each individual relationship. Is it secure enough to handle one-sided success? Would an extravagant gift compound the problem?
If my success wasn’t an issue, sure—I’d spread the joy, especially at Christmas. But maybe I’d stay away from individual toys. That might set a bad precedent, encourage everyone to compare gifts, and strain even the healthy relationships if the other party couldn’t give anything semi-good in return. Instead I’d fund a fancy social gathering everyone could enjoy together. Maybe a monster Christmas party with top notch door prizes, ice sculptures and a celebrity chef!
I’ve been helped out by one relative over the years (with the understanding of long term eventually payback) and would definitely pay that back with interest. And one other relative & I have joking agreements about “If I won the lottery, I’d buy you a jacuzzi/toy/pay off your mortgage” and they have vice versa. Aside from those… no, probably not. It’d create seriously screwed up social interactions. I’d probably be as subtle as possible about it. But I’d definitely start grabbing the check a lot more often. The last time I was doing significantly better than my crowd financially I did that.
Unless I knew they needed money, I wouldn’t just hand them a pile of cash. However I love giving gifts and I would give them really cool gifts that I knew they really wanted. I would pay for some remodeling my parents want on their house as well. Their mortgage is paid off otherwise I would pay that off as well. I know they would also love if I gave to a charity in their names. So I would be sharing my money with my friends and family just not cash. I would give to them because I love giving gifts. I think I enjoy giving even more than I enjoy getting.
I’ve actually spent some time thinking about this – in daydream land – over the years. Yes, I’d give buy a house outright for each of my 4 kids and myself, then I’d pay all my debt off, then with whatever is left, I’d split it 5 ways for each of my 4 kids and myself to live on.
Sounds sick – but I’d continue working because I really like my job!
Absolutely! I wouldn’t be were I am in life if it weren’t for those around me, working to support my dreams and goals. Giving is essential.
Of course I would first make sure that my family are taken care of and that our debts and future investments, college for one, are paid off. Then I would definitely invest all of the money either in the dreams and goals of the people around me or in ways that would get that money earning over time.
But, I’m not talking handouts or blank checks. I would definitely try to reduce any debts that they had or try to establish some sort of fund that they could count on to grow over time. Maybe a savings or annuity, something that they could use as an emergency fund or to save for something larger than they could normally afford.
Absolutely. I don’t think I could keep it all to myself and still be able to sleep at night. Those that I surround myself with are there for a reason and have undoubtedly helped me with building the company. They are my own personal psychiatrists, physical therapists, advisors, trainers, and entertainment. They should be rewarded accordingly.
I would help my parents and immediate family first. They were stuck with me, my friends had plenty of chances to leave it’s their fault for not seizing those opportunities. Debts with interest would be the first thing I’d want to tick off the list. Next would be the fun stuff. A trip to Greece for the overworked mother, a golf trip to Arizona for the stressed out father, and nights on the town for the older brothers (they didn’t beat me up too bad so I can’t totally leave them out).
After a few small gifts to friends who’ve helped in the past, I’d invest the rest. Or buy a parking garage in a metropolitan area.
There is a lot of stories about families where the generations who did not work for the money end up pretty screwed up. Silver spoon in mouth, etc.
If the corrupting influences of money happen to those who were born into it then a gilt of any significance could trigger similar problems.
It might feel good to spread the wealth and buy people things. Should the person making the gift assume some responsibility for the negative impact?
Hand out vs. hand up? Supporting people vs. destroying their lives?
Rewarding those who helped you achieve your goals is easy to understand. In some way they earned a share. In other ways some family and friends are the reason we hold back and do not succeed. They talk you out of your dreams because they fear you might struggle. Do you reward bad advice?
The question is a lot less simple than it seems. Many who come into money find that family and friends start to think they are entitled. People hitting you up for funding who do not realize that some requests are a bad idea.
No, not in general. Where there’s real hardship, I’d be willing to step in, if asked. (And gently let it be known I can be asked).
But I’d definitely look at backing friends and family pursuing their dreams. Getting an education, starting a business, establish a charitable foundation — something they really believe in. I’d be an active investor, too — that is, I’d give of my time to support them, not just the moolah.
Definetly! Me and my family are very close; we all do stuff for each other. it would be a great way to repay them!
It is best to give than to recieve. Charity begins at home!!!!! Make them work for every penny….