Episode 509: You’ve Been Writing ‘Thank You’ Notes All Wrong

Originally appeared on: http://web.archive.org/web/20220528032236/https://www.quickanddirtytips.com/productivity/project-management/youve-been-writing-thank-you-notes-all-wrong

The problem with Thank You cards or follow-ups is that they happen after the event, when your motivation is low. Instead, do the bulk of the writing before the event, while the anticipation is high.

July 2, 2018

It’s summer, and we all know what time of the year summer is: wedding time, of course! So if you want to subsume yourself into a four-legged, four-eyed amalgamation of merged identity, this is your chance. Grab that girlfriend, boyfriend, intersex friend, or polyamorous family unit, pop the question, and soon you too can tie the knot at your very own wedding!
And why not? They’re a blast. You dress up in fancy clothes, attend an incredible feast, and gorge on delicious food. Then you and your newly minted shmoopie go home and enjoy all the free stuff you got from your friends. You can even go super classy and give every guest their own can of cheese spray. It will be the most memorable wedding ever.

Thank You Notes

The downside, however, is that you have to write thank you notes for all those nice presents. But let’s face it: when the wedding is over, you have a honeymoon to go on, and then a life to live…who wants to write thank you notes? Sheesh.

Write Before the Event

You’re less motivated because you already have the stuff. The Robotic Auto-vac is busily vacuuming up your dust bunnies, as well as your pet cat, Fluffy. We loved Fluffy, but hey, solve the cat hair problem at the source, right?
The voice-activated, internet-connected smoke alarm is industriously sending your location data back to the NSA. And the Turnip Twaddler is already twaddling its first few turnips. Why in the world would you take time out of this perfect life to write thank you notes? You wouldn’t. That’s why you write them before the wedding.
The concept is simple: Do any onerous task *before *the event, when your motivation is at its peak.
You know the guest list. You know who’s likely to bring you great swag. As part of the wedding preparations, set aside an afternoon and write out all your thank you notes. “Dear Aunt Thing, Shmoopie and I couldn’t be happier that you attended our most special day!” Leave a little blank space, and then sign your names with a big flourish.

Mail After the Event

Stamp and address the envelope. When you return from your ceremony, sit down with the stack of notes. For all of the wretched, ignoble people who didn’t give you squat, just seal their Thank You and drop it in the mail.
For everyone else, in the blank space you left, write in “We love the Auto-vac! Fluffy does too!” Then seal it and drop it in the mail.
In a matter of minutes, you will have powered through your Thank Yous and be free as a bird to head out to your honeymoon. Remember to post lots of pictures to make everyone else insanely jealous.

Write Your Thank Yous in Advance for Parties

This doesn’t just work when you’re throwing a wedding. If you’re invited to a nice dinner party, or any event where a Thank You would be called for, write out the thank you note ahead of time while the motivation is fresh. Leave it on your foyer table, stamped and addressed, with a pen next to it. The same pen you used to write the first part of the message…it looks weird if the pen color changes halfway through the message.
Then after the event, jot in any personalized details and drop it in the mail.

Write Conference Follow-ups

When you return from the conference, zip through your business cards, cut and paste the message text into a new email, and replace XXXX with whatever you actually spoke about. Then hit send. In mere moments, you’re done!
The problem with Thank You cards or follow-ups is that they happen after the event, when your motivation is low. Instead, do the bulk of the writing before the event, while the anticipation is high. Then fill in any event-specific details when you return. All that’s left is the super-easy work of dropping it in the mailbox or hitting Send if it’s email.
Now that you know how easy it is, what are you waiting for? Propose to your boyfriend, girlfriend, intersex friend, polyamorous family unit, or even just a stranger on the street. You’ll get all the fun of holding a wedding, and you now know how to give Thanks. Beforehand.

Stever Robbins is a graduate of W. Edward Deming’s Total Quality Management training program and a Certified Master Trainer Elite of NLP. He holds an MBA from the Harvard Business School and a BS in Computer Sciences from MIT.

Work Less, Do More, and have a Great Life!

About the Author

Stever Robbins was the host of the Get-it-Done Guy podcast, an iTunes top-10 business podcast, from 2007 to 2020. He is a graduate of W. Edward Deming’s Total Quality Management training program and a Certified Master Trainer Elite of NLP. He holds an MBA from the Harvard Business School and a degree in Computer Science from MIT.